Written by guest blogger Paulo - founder of NewEarthNutrition on Instagram.
We’re all suckers for inspirational before & after weight loss stories but this is not one of them. This is my after the after story.
See, Nobody really talks about what happens after the fact. Diet culture dictates that we should vilify the “befores” & glorify the “afters”. The “befores” are typically stigmatized despite their efforts or underlying medical condition. They’re all just lazy right? And the “afters” are celebrated despite the hidden detrimental costs of their success. ⠀ ⠀
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And we all want to be celebrated of course so we try & “improve” ourselves. However, we usually approach a weight loss journey as something static that ends after losing a certain amount of lbs. But it doesn’t really end there.
I struggled with my weight & my body image issues for the majority of my waking life. I really hated myself so I thought I should change myself through discipline. I wanted to be an “after” story so bad I did things that are uncharacteristic of me.
I fasted for weeks on end, drank various concoctions of cleansing juices, & I did extreme diets and exercises. I forced my body into submission & eventually I turned my life around. Before losing over a hundred lbs I was miserable & depressed. After losing weight I became depressed & miserable. ⠀ ⠀
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In essence, nothing really changed. Despite the superficial bodily improvements & hollow approval from others I still felt that I was the same piece of crap person. Still, I wasn’t “enough”
We strive for optimal weight because it’s fundamentally about our health. But somewhere along the way we start doing it for the wrong reasons. And this pursuit, this grueling abuse that I’ve put my body through for the sake of an “ideal image” & for the hopes that maybe others will love me seemed to have caused more problems than what it intended to solve. ⠀
I ended up with a dysfunctional relationship with my friends, my family, with food, & most especially with myself.
So yeah, Just know that all that glitters is not necessarily gold. Strive for health but do it out of self love and not self hatred.
